Join the FREE 30-day Social Confidence Challenge and massively reduce your social anxiety
... from the comfort of your own home
You will learn about a powerful, scientifically proven emotional relief technique. And you will apply this technique to release your social anxiety. NO NEED to awkwardly face your fears. And like thousands of others, you will significantly reduce your social anxiety suffering.
Hard to believe? Watch the video below.
REGISTRATION IS CLOSED
We ran 2 MASSIVELY SUCCESSFUL 30-Day Challenges
and we are currently running the third one (Jan 1, 2021 Batch).
We'll do another one in the near future, for sure!
If you want to be part it, sign up below,
and you will be notified once the next challenge starts.
Learn A Powerful Emotional Release Technique
I've used this technique to overcome my own social anxiety. And I've helped hundreds of clients do the same.
You'll learn how to use this simple, powerful technique. So you can apply it to overcoming your social anxiety.
Discover The Blueprint
To Social Confidence
When you've suffered from social anxiety for a long time... transformation won't happen overnight (though progress happens rapidly).
To become completely anxiety-free requires a journey: #TheJourneyToSocialConfidence
That journey is broken down into 5 stages. And there are 21 milestones.
This roadmap makes your journey crystal clear. You'll know exactly how to go from social anxiety to effortless social ease.
Your Social Anxiety
You'll be guided through simple lessons and powerful exercises.
Day by day you'll start feeling less anxious. More confident. More at ease.
And step-by-step you begin breaking down your social anxiety challenges.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is my social anxiety story?
My social anxiety began when I was 11/12 years old. And it got progressively worse
Around age 16, when girls came into the picture, I felt anxious in almost all social situations.
Life was depressing. I saw myself as the biggest loser. I was deeply ashamed of myself…
And I desperately wanted to prove myself not to be a loser.
I felt insecure around most people.
In social situations, it felt like people wanted me to look bad.
That they wanted me to look foolish and become embarrassed.
And that was one of my biggest fears: Looking embarrassed.
It wasn’t the embarrassment that I feared so much. Rather, it was people seeing me embarrassed, awkward, anxious.
I didn’t want them to laugh at me, look down on me, pity me, or think of me as weak.
It made me feel inferior just thinking about it.
As a result of these insecurities, I had this tough exterior shell. I tried hard to ‘be cool’. But that shell resulted in me not being able to connect with others.
I could actually give off the impression I was fine, most of the time...
... but inside, I was deeply insecure, anxious and uncomfortable.
And because it sucked so much to be around people, I avoided as many social gatherings I could stay away from with a clever excuse.
I often felt deeply lonely and feared it’d never change.
I was so anxious in some conversations that it was near impossible to actually listen to what someone was saying.
Often my heart was beating fast and I felt so anxious that I totally lost whatever was said.
Or worse, what I myself was saying!
In conversations, I was trying to say the right things at the right time, and avoid saying something stupid.
But it was really hard.
And as I felt anxious I just knew they could see my awkwardness. Sometimes it even made them awkward, and that then made cringe…
I was constantly monitoring how I came across, worrying about how they perceived me.
I was “in my head” most of the time.
Socializing was hard.
Especially with guys I thought were “cool” or girls I was attracted to.
When I went to an event that I couldn’t get out of (a birthday party, work outing, hang out with friends), I’d come home exhausted.
Trying to control the way I came across -making people believe I was fine- took a lot out of me.
It drained me.
So because they weren’t enjoyable, I started to avoid most of the difficult social situations.
And then, when NOT in a social situation, there was my mind constantly attacking me.
I was constantly worrying about my “reputation”.
Doom-thinking about the future.
Criticizing and judging myself (and others), and making up worst-case scenarios (and then fearing it would happen).
This nonsense was constantly occupying my mind.
And I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t control it.
My mind wouldn’t leave me alone.
I frequently woke up dreading the day, and went to bed anxious about the next...
Long story short, life was really tough.
Can you relate?
I suffered from severe social anxiety for nearly 15 years.
To resolve it, I tried facing some of my worst fears (from to approaching women to public speaking, and from purposefully getting myself rejected to purposefully embarrassing myself)…
… and got really disappointing results.
The standard solution to beat social anxiety of “changing thoughts, being mindful, and forcefully facing fears” did not work for me…”
I did feel a lot more confident after facing my fears.
But the confidence I gained was only temporary…
… a few days later, I was back to feeling anxious and insecure. It did not work. And that was absolutely terrifying…
I feared I’d have to live with my social anxiety for the rest of my life.
In 2006, my desperate search for solutions led me to finding EFT tapping.
This powerful emotional release technique turned out to be the key to my transformation.
This scientifically proven to be effective technique quickly releases negative emotions. And limiting beliefs.
Hard to believe, perhaps.
At least for me, it triggered my bullshit alarm.
How can something as silly as tapping on your face and body work?
My initial thought was that it was some kind of scam.
But it actually turned out to be an incredibly powerful technique to become more socially confident.
With it I could release the shame, insecurity, and anxiety I felt… (you’ll learn all about tapping and how to use it to overcome SA during the challenge).
Using tapping, and the help of some brilliant therapists, I eventually managed to overcome my social anxiety completely.
I’ve now been at ease socially for years.
Which is pretty damn amazing if you know where I had to come from…
I’m now present and in the moment. Eye contact is natural. I connect effortlessly.
And I actually enjoy socializing.
Whereas it used to drain me, it now nourishes me. I look forward to it.
I have a lot of fun with friends. I easily interact with “strangers”. And I’ve even become a Latin dancer, and have danced all over the world now.
Something unimaginable if you’d seen me 15 years ago…
Socializing has now become something normal and automatic. Effortless.
I don’t have to think of what to say. I don’t worry about running out of things to say. I simply feel calm and at ease being myself.
This definitely didn’t happen overnight.
It was a gradual process that required a lot of persistence.
But it’s so been worth it...
In 2009, I had made significant progress. I was a lot less anxious.
And I decided I was ready to start coaching others to overcome their social anxiety.
In hindsight, I wasn’t exactly a great coach…
But thanks to EFT’s power, my clients still got significant reductions of their social anxiety.
Since I wasn’t totally socially at ease myself…
… and because my clients also didn’t fully overcome their social anxiety…
… I kept studying tapping.
And trauma. And personal development. And psychology. Neuroscience. NLP. And basically anything and everything I could get my hands on to improve.
I’ve since received over 600 coaching, therapy, and supervision sessions. And I’ve spent over $120 000,- on being coached and mentored by the best I could find.
I have been (and am) working with my own level coach on a weekly basis. For over 10 years. And I work on a bi-weekly basis with my psychotherapist mentor since 2014.
I mention this to let you know that I haven’t just discovered tapping and quickly put a 30-day challenge together.
This isn’t your typical ‘somewhat helpful challenge’.
This challenge is created to be life-changing for you.
It contains the best of the best of nearly 2 decades absorbed in Social Anxiety Solutions.
See, I’ve been at this for a long time.
My first Youtube video sharing EFT dates 2009. And I started the popular ‘Social Anxiety Solutions’ podcast show in 2015. I’ve further put in 5,000 hours of coaching clients.
This has led to many profound discoveries. Key mindsets for recovery. And strategies that consistently work for sufferers.
And… You’re getting the best of the best of all of this!
Plus, you’ll see amazing video testimonials of people who overcame their social anxiety.
You’ll discover the 5 stages from social anxiety to social confidence.
I share 'The 3 Golden Keys To Effortless Social Ease' (yes, it rhymes).
And best of all, you’re supported along with thousands of others on your #JourneyToSocialConfidence.
Together we work towards that goal, one simple step at a time.
Jan 1st can be the start of a whole new life for you. One with more ease, confidence, and joy. Connection. And fun.
I’m sure that’s sounding “too good to be true”. And you may think it
“works for others, but not for me”.
I get it.
Just read what I’ll be sending you. And, DO THE SIMPLE EXERCISES during the challenge.
Last two challenges were life-changing for those who participated.
And nothing happened for more than 50%.
You know what 50% that was?
It was the ones the signed up, but never even started day #1!
Of course, if you do nothing, you get 0 results.
Don’t be that way.
I’ll be sending you emails every Tuesday and Thurs until we get started.
To get you excited about this.
Because this is worth your time. This is worth pushing yourself if you have to. This is worth making a priority.
And hey, I will not be asking you to do any weird exposures.
It all happens from the comfort of your own home.
But I can’t do it for you. You have to actually open your email. Read it. Watch the short video and follow along.
20min a day on average.
Can you do that?
If that’s a yes, things will begin to change for the better in 2021.
Count on it.
Hope this was helpful.
PS You can check the Social Anxiety Solutions podcast here. I suggest starting at episode #1 as here, I began interviewing various EFT Masters, doctors, psychotherapists, coaches, psychologists, etc.
Is EFT Tapping backed up by real science?
Wikipedia calls EFT tapping ‘pseudo-science’.
But tapping is anything but pseudoscience!
The moderators at Wikipedia, unfortunately, have a chip on their shoulder about anything ‘alternative’. And they delete the actual science anytime it’s been put in there (after all, you can edit Wikipedia pages yourself!)
The facts are that tapping has more than 100 scientific studies backing up its effectiveness.
And it further meets the criteria for evidence-based treatments set by the American Psychological Association for a number of conditions, including PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder).
In this video, I walk you through the actual scientific evidence backing up tapping’s effectiveness. And I refer you to the scientific literature, in case you want to check out the real facts.
So yes, tapping is backed up by real science.
It’s not a placebo (you don’t have to believe in it, and it still works). And it is exceptionally powerful when it comes to releasing anxiety.
As you can see in this video:
What if… it doesn’t work for me?
When I found this tapping technique (that you’ll learn about and are guided to experience during the challenge) and tried it, it actually didn’t work.
But I had seen so many testimonials of it… read on forums about it… and had seen experts of it transform people’s issues right on screen…
… that I was determined to make it work for me.
But despite that ‘thump-my-chest-self-motivation’ I also felt scared.
“What if it doesn’t work for me?”
“What if it works for others, but not for me?”
“What if I’m just too messed up?"
And that fear stuck with me for months, as I tried and tried but got no real results.
I mean, I thought I felt a little better. But nothing like these profound changes I had seen on the training DVD’s of the technique.
When I got back to Holland (I’m Dutch, but found out about EFT tapping when I was working for IBM in South Africa) I called a tapping practitioner.
He invited me to his workshop.
And I was actually scared to go. Because I had been building this up in my mind as ‘The Solution’ I’d been looking for SO MUCH…
… that I was scared to lose that feeling of hope it had given me.
I was thinking “if this doesn’t work, I’m fu*ked”
I was afraid to lose that hope. Because it felt a lot better than the despair and hopelessness I experienced for so long.
Now I ended up going, and had my world rocked (I’ll share what happened in day #1 of the challenge).
But I’m sharing this with you because…
… sometimes people rather not take action on something that might work for them…
… because they’re scared they’ll find out it doesn’t work for them.
And while I totally get that kind of thinking, it would be such a shame for you to miss out on this opportunity.
Here are some people who had similar thoughts, but decided to go for it anyway:
Hope this inspires you to get started anyway.
And, this solution I’m providing isn’t even the only way. There are many other ways too. But, it happens to be a very powerful and effective one.
That has worked for tons of people already.
Will it work for you?
There’s only one to find out.
How about giving it a committed try?
Would be glad to have you join us (you can be totally anonymous, if you prefer)
This sounds too good to be true! Hidden fees!
After the last challenge, I surveyed those who took the challenge. And I asked them why they thought nearly 40% didn’t start the challenge.
Here are some of the replies:
“They probably think there’s some hidden cost”
“They might feel that something is not alright”
“They thought they gonna paid to get access to some features”
“It seems too good to be true”
So let me just reassure you:
The 30 day challenge is completely F R E E.
I’m giving you the best I can within 30 days.
And it will rock your world. It’s nothing like you’ve ever experienced, anywhere, ever.
It’s also an introduction to my work, and the kinds of results I can help create, yes. And if you were to decide to need additional assistance after 30 days, this is available. At a cost.
But this isn’t some scheme to try to trick you into buying stuff.
I believe in “results first”. Because that way, you can make a well-informed decision about whether additional support is of interest to you.
So these 30 days there is no selling whatsoever.
This is completely focused on getting you the best results in just a single month.
Another answer I got from the survey said this:
“Since it’s free it must not be that great, right?”
Let me answer that too:
I can wrap this challenge up and sell it as a $500 program. It’s easily that good.
Here’s a quick comment about this (we had 3044 comments last challenge!):
PS Hey, just because there are a lot of unethical people on the worldwide web…
… doesn’t mean everyone is a scammer. Right?
I’ve poured my heart into this challenge for you. I really hope you give it a try. It’s time we shift the perception of what it takes to overcome social anxiety. Join us on #TheJourneyToSocialConfidence
I’m a tough case. This also won’t work for me :-(
It’s rare for me to speak to someone who believes they are ‘an easy case’.
Maybe 20% of the clients I’ve worked with in over a decade say their social anxiety isn’t as bad as they heard other’s anxiety is.
The rest believes they’re a tough case!
So you’re not alone.
However, it might very well be true. I cannot tell, of course.
However, I can tell you that believing ‘it won’t work for me’ is the most common thought everyone has.
That’s both the ‘easier cases’ and the so-called “tough cases”.
Now it is really depressing to think this way. But what’s even worse…
… is that this thinking stops most people from giving (new) things a committed try.
After all, if you believe it won’t work anyway, why bother?
So let me share a few thoughts with you.
First of all, believing 'it won’t work for me' makes total sense when nothing you try resolves your issue… doesn’t it?
When you try something that is supposed to work, but it doesn’t…
… what does that do to your hope that 'you'll overcome it?'
That’s right, it starts to drop.
In the beginning, when I tried overcoming my social anxiety I was convinced “I’ll overcome it!”.
And I was very passionate about it.
I read all the self-help ‘you can do it’ literature. I was doing empowering affirmations. And my room was full of inspiring quotes about courage, conquering fear, being your best self, and so on.
I was super motivated.
But when I forced myself hard to do the things that were supposed to be the solution and it didn’t work, it freaked me out.
“What if I have to live this way for the rest of my life?”
Not only that, it also started to add doubt to the belief I could overcome it.
I tried more things.
Very difficult to do.
I thought more effort, trying harder, would be the solution.
But I got the same disappointing results.
Now despair began to set in.
And my hope to overcome it was only minimal. A faint flicker in the background.
But I had devoured so much self-help that I wasn’t going to give up. It really convinced me of a ‘never give up attitude’. And I took honor in taking on that mindset. I had sworn to myself I’d accomplish my goal or I’d die trying.
Living with such intense social anxiety was unacceptable.
So I kept going’s despite the despair.
And then eventually things began turning in the right direction once I found tapping.
But I can assure you, having lived with despair for nearly a decade, I know what it feels like. I’ve been worried my brain was broken. That I was permanently damaged. That I was simply too messed up. That there was something really wrong with me. Which was beyond repair.
Very scary, depressing, and terrifying to feel this.
But yes, it makes sense that when the ‘experts’ say ‘this will work’ and you try it and it doesn’t work...
… that you become skeptical. The pain of another disappointment is something to avoid.
If you never try anything new because you generalize everything to be something that “won’t work for me anyway”
What if that is the exact thing that keeps you from ever making a positive change in your life?
And, what if not all strategies are the same?
What if not all techniques are the same?
What if some are more powerful than others?
And would it be possible that some techniques and strategies work better for you than others?
I’m asking you to consider the possibility that there might be hope for you.
To live the life you want and deserve. To feel at ease being YOU.
Because in reality, all that’s in the way of that is some childhood baggage, some painful life experiences, and some limiting beliefs.
After all, you’re not born anxious.
If you doubt that, have you ever seen any anxious babies?
So this means that you’ve “picked up” this crap leading to your anxiety. Your brain has learned it.
And what if you can also unlearn it.
I have. Many others have (and if you haven’t seen the video testimonials yet, I’ll share them during the 30 day challenge). All it takes is getting rid of the crap from the past.
So you stop re-living the past.
Now I make it sound easier than it is.
Because it really does take work to get rid of this ‘baggage’.
But it’s so incredibly empowering and liberating to do it. And my invitation to you is to consider the possibility it could be possible for you too.
The 30 day challenge guides you through a completely different strategy than anything you’ve ever tried.
Also if you’ve been tapping for years.
I introduce you to many things I’ve never shared. The best of what I’ve discovered in 19 years of immersion in Social Anxiety Solutions.
The ACT approach you’ll learn about…
… does NOT require you to forcefully face your fears.
A.C.T. sounds like you have to act physically.
Which might imply you need to go outdoors and hopscotching in the park. Or sing in the supermarket. Or lie down in public. Or…
Well, good news:
None of these awkward exposures are necessary.
I know, I know…
It’s counter to what mainstream says.
They say you need to force yourself to face your fears. And that it's the only way.
Well, that’s at best an outdated idea.
And the many psychotherapists, coaches, healers, PhD researchers and psychologists on my Social Anxiety Solutions podcast confirm this.
As does the latest science (more during the challenge).
Mainstream isn’t intentionally wrong. I know various therapists who work the old way. Just with changing thoughts, and exposures and so on.
They mean well.
But they're simply operating based upon old information.
So during the challenge, you’ll hear the latest info. And better yet, you’re guided through exercises. Simple ones. And it takes you 15-20 min of your time.
The approach I introduce you to is gentle. And scientifically proven to be effective (more than 100 scientific studies confirm its effectiveness). And it meets the criteria for evidence-based treatments set by the American Psychological Association for a number of conditions, including PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)
Since you’ve never tried THIS strategy, and it that has worked for countless others…
… what if this could work for you too?
What if this could work for you too?
We’re getting started Jan 1st.
Hope you’ll join us.
PS When I used to say to my coach "it just seems too good to be true"...
... she'd reply "What if this is too good NOT to be true?"
Ponder that 😉
This will be tough, right? And 30 days, pffff.
I don’t know about you, but I’m not a big fan of doing things that are boring.
Same goes for things that are really hard.
And I especially hate what universally sucks: Putting in effort and not getting any promised results.
Boring + hard + no results —> NO ACTION.
It’s why I did so poorly in school!
When something is interesting, easy, and gets me results, however…
… I’m in!
Interesting + ease + results —> MASSIVE ACTION!
That’s why I’ve designed the 30 day challenge to provide exactly that. And based upon feedback from the last one, I think it went alright.
And I’m very happy I can provide this for you.
Because you can feel so hopeless and desperate when you have to do things that are really hard… That also don’t get any (lasting) results!
That’s what happened for me.
I faced my worst fears to try to overcome my social anxiety.
And if they had indeed helped me beat it…
… I’d probably now be writing: “you MUST face your fears!”
But that’s is NOT MY MESSAGE TO YOU AT ALL.
Because facing my worst fears (I’ll share some of the crazy stories inside the challenge) only gave me a temporary boost of confidence.
Within a few days, my confidence was gone, and I felt super anxious and insecure again.
Now forcing myself to face my fears was hard.
And that’s an understatement.
I mean, I couldn’t sleep days in advance of my ‘exposures’.
They were absolutely gut-wrenchingly horrible to do.
But I did them.
Because I expected it would help.
After all, every piece of literature told me it was the only way out of my fear.
And all these inspirational quotes are all about facing your fears. And getting outside of your freakin comfort zone…
So, I did it. And it was hard. And it sucked.
And results were poor (the heard-earned confidence left after a few days).
So, I looked for other ways.
The technique I eventually found after 5, 6 years of trying just about anything on the market…
(affirmations, Tony Robbins, NLP, hypnosis, timeline therapy, changing my thoughts, journaling, rehearsing conversations, social skills training, deep breathing, visualization, all the self-help books and tapes on confidence available, etc etc etc)
… changed my life.
Cheesy statement, I know.
When I read those statement, it instantly makes me go “right, another one of those stories”…
… but it’s true.
Because I finally found something practical.
I could ‘do it’ and actually let go of my fears, worries, and anxiety.
Which was amazing. I felt so empowered now that I could actually DO something.
And once I learned how to use it properly, it wasn't hard at all.
The most challenging thing was that I experienced negative emotions.
But hey - I felt them in the comfort of my own home. So it was easy to deal with.
Plus, when they came up, I simply kept tapping and in a short time, they would subside.
This is the power of tapping :-)
Now this 30 Day Social Confidence Challenge is done from your own home. You’re not asked to go high five strangers, do push-ups in public, call out bus stops out loud, approach strangers, or any of that other 'face your fear' stuff.
Instead, we powerfully address your INNER psychology.
We release your emotions and shifts your limiting beliefs. And we do this because your social anxiety problem is an ‘inside job’.
The problem is not outside of you. It’s one the inside. So we focus on making shifts and changes there.
Not in a scary way. In a gentle, step-by-step manner.
Now, it’s not a total walk in the park. Don’t get me wrong.
It requires effort, persistence, dedication, and working through emotional ups- and downs.
But, this is an actual practical way to get rid of your anxiety.
By using this approach, you can become completely anxiety-free.
I watched a documentary on Netflix the other day. And it was about anxiety. In the end, one of the experts was asked “so can you completely overcome anxiety?”
And his answer was something along the lines of:
“rather than thinking of overcoming, we want to think of how to change our relationship with anxiety. It will never truly go away, but we can create a much better relationship with it”.
And man did that fire me up.
Because that’s SUCH an OUTDATED PERSPECTIVE!
He’s right in that you can create a much better relationship with your anxiety. And part of the challenge focuses on this.
But he’s wrong in saying that it cannot be overcome completely. In my personal experience and professional experience, you can completely overcome it.
This is why I’m fighting the good fight, getting the news out there.
It’s part of the reason for why you have this F R E E challenge. To prove that it’s possible to beat your social anxiety completely.
You can completely overcome your social anxiety.
I’ve done it. Many of my coaching clients have (and again, you’ll see actual VIDEO TESTIMONIALS inside the challenge)…
… and you can too.
It might take some time. It won’t happen overnight. And even by the end of the 30 days, you’re likely not totally social anxiety free.
BUT - you can make profound, life-changing progress within 30 days. All it takes is reading a daily email. And following along with a simple exercise on video.
All done from home!
Plus, you’ll learn about fascinating new concepts. You get to understand your social anxiety better than 99% of the psychologists out there. And you’ll actually get more control over your mental and emotional well being.
Many people commented that they ENJOYED the challenge. And that they don't normally finish any challenges, but now they did.
See I’ve done my best to make it entertaining.
And above all, something that gets you RESULTS.
Day by day, you’re going to feel more and more empowered. And the feeling that you can and will overcome your social anxiety will grow, bit by bit, day by day.
The following is really hard to believe, I know, but:
This approach is both more gentle and far more effective than forcefully facing your fears.
And, you get faster results too, that are lasting.
So while you’ve lost motivation doing other programs/things in the past. And you didn’t follow through…
… is it at least possible that you might follow through this time?
30 days can feel like forever when you don’t like doing it.
But when you ENJOY it…
… you can’t wait for it and you don’t want it to end! All I’m inviting you to do…
… is to give it a committed try.
Nothing to lose.
And a reduction in your social anxiety, more confidence, more ease, more comfort being yourself to be gained.
Jan 1st we launch!
Struggle to change? Here’s why people don’t change…
Did you know that most people struggle to get lasting changes?
And I’m not just talking about overcoming social anxiety here.
Think of how many people want to reach their ideal weight… start their own business… get into a relationship… or stop smoking…
… who fail miserably.
The reality of the situation is that certain change simply isn’t easy.
But that it’s not easy is actually not the thing that stops people.
What is it then?
It’s their psychology!
As famous personal development Guru Tony Robbins says:
“Success is 20% work and 80% psychology”
So if you don’t get your psychology right, guess what…
You won’t lose the weight.
You won’t stop smoking.
You won’t get into a relationship.
… and you indeed won’t overcome your social anxiety.
But here the good news:
You can change your psychology about change.
Yes, a bit of an odd sentence. But that is what I intended to write.
See, there’s a whole psychology behind change.
To create lasting change, you need to understand this.
When you get what happens with your thinking, feeling, and behavior during a desired transformation…
… change becomes a lot easier!
And frankly, it becomes possible.
A wrong mindset can lead to failure.
I’ll give you a simple example…
Say that you believe change is linear.
Meaning that when you start to take action, things should get better. And then when you take more action, things should get even better. And then when you take even more action, things would get even better.
Until you’ve reached your goal.
A popular belief.
Well, you’d then get really upset when you’d have a “setback”.
You might then talk to yourself like this:
“OMG, I knew this was too good to be true. See, now I’m back to square one. This too doesn’t work for me. I’m just a tough case. There’s something wrong with me. I’m just broken and nothing works for me”.
And guess what that leads to?
That’s right, you’d likely give up. Or at the very least be a lot less motivated to continue.
The reality of the situation however is that change is not linear.
In fact, the #JourneyToSocialConfidence is an up-and-down journey.
You make some progress. Then you plateau for a bit. Then you feel a tiny bit worse. Then you have a little breakthrough. Then you feel a lot better. Then you hit another plateau for a bit. You make some small tiny changes. Then you have another breakthrough.
And “setbacks” are simply part of this up-and-down journey.
Now don’t get me wrong, they really suck in the moment…
Because you’ve been doing so much better, and then this!
But they’re actually fantastic ‘healing opportunities’. And nearly always there’s a huge breakthrough after a “setback”.
Now if you know this, you react very differently when you have a setback.
Now your self-talk might be something like this:
“OK this really sucks. But I know this is normal. It is just temporary. And it’s part of the ride. Plus, I have the tools to move past it. And once I do, there’s a breakthrough. While this is hard for me, I’ll focus on creating this breakthrough. I can do this.”.
And guess what that mindset does?
See, your psychology about change is essential. I’ll go into a lot more depth about this during the challenge. And I dedicate a whole day to “setbacks”.
… I wanted to give you a tiny bit more, if you’re up for it.
I created a video explaining why a lot of people on some level fear change. And how this stops them from moving forward.
Or at least, move forward consistently (until they achieve their goal).
And in the video, I’m specifically talking about the fear of change when it comes to overcoming social anxiety.
There’s this big misconception lots of people have.
Which is totally false.
Believing that leads to fear and resistance to change.
Which stops you from making lasting change.
It blocks your social ease.
You can check out the video here.
I think you’ll like it.
PS In the video, we do a bit of EFT tapping too. In case you’re not familiar yet, just follow along as best you can. Tap where I tap. And if you’re not sure where I exactly tap, just tap roughly in the same area. Monkey see, monkey do. You don’t have to do it perfectly, and it still works. During the challenge, we’ll get into more details.
Can I participate anonymously?
Back when I suffered badly I’d spend an hour writing a simple text message.
“What if I say the wrong thing?”
“Can this be misinterpreted?”
“Do I sound cool?"
“Does this come across needy or lame?”
“Will they get it, or do I need to explain it clearer?”
“Can I send this already, or should I wait?”
“I hope he doesn’t get upset when I write this.”
Etc etc etc.
And I’ve even debated hitting or not hitting a like button for ages.
And then debating afterwards whether or not I made the right decision the whole day!
So, I get it if you worry about being seen, heard, or recognized.
But, you can actually choose to be anonymous.
No need to use a picture. Only use your first name (or heck, even use a fake name).
And hey, if you never make any comments, you can participate completely anonymously!
It’s not necessary to make comments.
However, as you read everyone’s experience under the videos, and you can relate… and you go “OMG, these people are just like me, they get me”...
… you might be inspired to participate after all.
And when your social anxiety is really bad, you might bit by bit begin to climb out of your misery…
Jan 1st we kick off!
Can you begin to imagine what your life might be like when you’re at ease socially?
I don’t have time for this right now…
It’s crazy how many things we’ve got going on these days, isn’t it?
I’m sometimes jealous of my daughter, who just has a couple of simple things going on:
Shower, brush, etc
Well anyway, as adults we’ve got a lot more on our plates.
And if you’re too busy at this time…
… maybe this challenge isn’t for you. There’s another chance next year.
But that’s 365 days from now.
And what if next year you’re again ‘too busy’?
In my life, when I say “no time right now” it might really be true.
But what the actual meaning for me is this:
“This is not important enough for me right now”.
Let me give you an example.
A rather extreme one, but still.
If you got a phone call saying that someone you love is in the hospital. And you need to come to visit right away…
Will you say “no sorry, I don’t have the time right now”
See, where you choose to spend your time is a matter of priority.
And I’d like to ask you…
… what would it be like if you make ‘overcoming social anxiety’ your priority?
I’m asking this question because I’m hoping you’re willing to consider the possibility of doing so.
Because I’m confident that you'll get benefits when you follow along with the simple, good-feeling exercises we do together each day during the challenge…
… you will reduce your social anxiety in 30 days.
And, this will improve the quality of your life. And, that improvement is FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!
Now that’s hard to believe I’m sure.
But if even half of what you’re reading in all these testimonials I’m sharing is true…
… wouldn’t it be worth your time? And it’s just roughly 20min a day…
The real question is: What are you willing to do to live your life feeling at ease around others?
I’m sure you’ve got lots going on. I do too.
But is it really true that you can’t make 20min available, in the 16 hours that you’re awake?
Here’s what happened with some more people, who decided to make the previous challenge a priority:
We’re kicking off first of Jan!
I’m so excited.
Looking forward to seeing you inside the challenge!