This is completely false. In fact, when you are tuned into a particular emotion, and you start stimulating these acupressure points without saying anything, and you don't have any resistance, it will start to neutralize. It will begin to calm down.

So why are we saying certain words during tapping?

In the original EFT, we say these words in order to remain focused on the emotions, because as we focus on the emotions and we tap, the emotion [without resistance] begins to neutralize. 

Now there are ways to be very clever with the wording, but that's more advanced. To keep it simple, focus on intention statements that you've learned ("I release all my emotional attachments to... etc) and venting your thoughts and feelings while you tap.

Because that’s what’s getting in the way.

It’s not positive thoughts that keep us stuck - it’s the negative ones. The self-criticism, fear, shame, or painful memories. Tapping works by helping your system release the emotional charge behind those negative thoughts and feelings.

Once those don’t feel so true or intense anymore, then positive thoughts can actually land - they feel real, and you can take them in.

So we focus on the negative to clear it out, not to reinforce it.

Sometimes, there is more power in saying the words with emphasis out loud.

For example, if you're recalling a painful moment when your mom said something hurtful, and you repeat that phrase out loud with emotion, it can help the tapping work more deeply

Most of the time however, you can just do it in your mind, and whispering is perfectly fine. That being said, whenever there's an opportunity to say it out loud, I recommend saying it out loud. 

Not at all. Many of our members are from non-English-speaking countries such as Germany, India, Hungary, Spain, Poland, Colombia, Turkey, you name it - and they do just fine.

As long as you understand what I’m saying, your subconscious does the translating for you. You don’t need to convert everything into your native language word-for-word.

That said, if there’s a phrase or a word in your language that really hits you emotionally, feel free to use that while tapping. Using your own language can sometimes make tapping more powerful but it’s totally optional. EFT isn’t tied to any specific language.

So bottom line: If you understand me, you're good to go.

Tap whenever you get triggered, or when you want to neutralize a specific social anxiety issue.

During the specific time that you want to work on a specific issue, I recommend determining what the issue is, and then continuing to do focused little tapping sessions on it, until the problem is resolved.

Yes it can be challenging sometimes indeed, as one things leads to the next and the next. But you can indeed keep a notebook, which is helpful. And, you can simply keep coming back to a particular issue over and over until it's dealt with.

This super focused tapping is Gary Craig's approach (founder of EFT) and most follow this. I usually do this too, as it makes your results more easily measurable

If you switch to something else (called "switching aspects") this can simply be a good sign that the original issue isn't bothering you much anymore. And you're off to the new thing.

Or, it may be a sign that you're dealing with resistance to resolving the thing you're working on. Try saying the following statement:

"I release all my resistances and aversions... to being in this present moment right now."

Wait for 30 seconds. And then say the following:

"I release all my resistances and aversions to accepting this issue."

Wait for 30 seconds.

Now try again to tap on what you were originally tapping on.

Coming back to the same issue (being persistent with it) and continuing to keep an eye on resistance (which may send you off in other directions) can make you more efficient in focused tapping.

That said, this is only one way of going about it. Steve Wells and David Lake use continual tapping, and simply tell you to "focus on the next thing that bothers you". This makes tapping much easier, doesn't have you worry about missing the key issues, and still has you make great progress (because you're getting release on your issues!). The only downside is that it's less measurable in the moment, and you can be less obsessive compulsive about measuring results. But hey, for some of us this might be a great thing ;-)

Yes.  If I would give you all the possible reasons why it doesn't work, they would not fit in this little space! But here's a quick answer: 

When it's not working, there's always a reason for it. 

It doesn't mean that tapping doesn't work.

It doesn't mean that you're broken.

It only means:

• that you need more understanding
• that you need more tapping skills
• that you might need some outside help. 

Usually what's going on is that there's resistance to change. Some part of you doesn't feel safe making the change. As a result, your brain will prevent the tapping process from being effective. 

However, you can use the tapping process to target this specific resistance or the reasons why your subconscious believes that change isn't safe. When you've released the resistance, now it becomes safe to change. And then, when you focus on the problem, when you do the tapping, it will now begin to work. 

Tap hard enough to feel it, not so hard it hurts ;-)

The numbness may indicate that you have other compounding problems aside from just social anxiety, and you need to think about having therapy and doing this online course separately.

It’s best to consult with your mental health care provider when you suspect this may be the case.

Therapy makes you sufficiently emotionally stronger, and a warm empathic therapist may help you reconnect with your emotions over time.

I suggest finding someone who’s both a therapist and an EFT expert (or someone who uses other forms of energy psychology, or trauma processing other than just talk therapy) who has experience working with clients who are “numb”.

While this will take your time, dedication, and effort, it is well worth the investment. The way you get to feel is worth a hundredfold of all of any effort you’ve put in.

That might not be what you want to hear, but it is important you get the best possible help for your situation.

And this is something I dealt with in the beginning of my EFT journey as well. And I have worked with a lot of different therapists to move past this issue. And I’m forever grateful I did.

What happened for me was…

I would get triggered in real life scenarios, but when I was asked in a therapy session how I felt about XYZ I had no emotional response whatsoever. Couldn't feel anything.

A few things I’ve since learned that I am aware of that could be going on here. One is that you’re not vividly imagining what can be going on.

Some simple instructions (really vividly image being in the situation again, step into your younger self's shoes, see what you saw, notice the details, the expressions on the faces, the look in the eyes, hear the sounds, tune into what you felt) can remedy this.

But this is less commonly the case when you can't feel the feelings. Though try this first!

My guess is that it’s likely that your subconscious has switched off your ability to sense in order to keep you safe and protect you from the emotional pain.

This is what likely was the case for me.

I had experienced a lot of trauma for a long time, and my subconscious had shut off the ability to access my feelings about the past. It took a lot of work of getting my subconscious to understand that I was safe before I started feeling emotions again.

One powerful way I’ve benefited from was “Matrix Re-imprinting” which is an advanced form of EFT which combines Neuro Linguistic Programming and Inner Child work.

As you clear some of the really painful traumas that happened using these techniques, your subconscious may start feeling it’s safe for you to become more sensitive to your emotions again.

Another thing that could potentially be going on, is that it wasn't OK to feel your feelings when growing up. So there’s a lot of repressed feeling. Your relationship with feelings and emotions needs to be “healed”.

Additionally, there's another emotional healing tool called "the Emotion Code" or another one called "PSYCH-K" which can be very helpful too.

I have benefited from both tremendously (but they're possibly even more weird and whacky so I don't promote them as much).

Hope this helps you and best of luck. There is a way out of this. Persistence wins the race.

Yes and no. You don’t have to go digging for old memories.

Traditional EFT often focuses on uncovering and tapping through past events, but the way I work is a bit different. I’ve developed my own style over the years, combining the best techniques from EFT Masters I trained with, along with insights from psychologist Steve Wells and my mentor, Dr. David Lake.

In my approach, we usually just work with whatever’s coming up in the present moment. That’s often enough. But here’s the thing: memories tend to show up on their own. You don’t have to force them. When they do come up, it’s usually because they’re ready to be resolved.

Specific targets are things like negative emotions, memories, beliefs, fantasies, emotionalised thoughts (worries, negative expectations, etc).

Ideally, yes. However, you can tap on a memory and reduce it. That's already going to benefit you.

And after you tap on a memory and you get it to a low number, it may just be that the rest neutralizes over time because you've created movement.

That being said, if you can, you definitely want to keep going and get it all the way to zero.

If you're really going for it and you're struggling, there's likely something going on that's preventing you from getting into zero. Things like: general or specific resistance to change, or it being tied to other related memories, beliefs, and fantasies.